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One of the biggest keys to being happy is learning to love yourself. Even if everything in your life was exactly where you wanted it to be, if you aren’t able to appreciate yourself, you won’t be at peace… period.
Almost all of your relationships — past, present, and future — mirror how you are feeling about yourself at this moment.
Is it normal for you to punish yourself for your failures more than reward yourself for your success? This is certainly true for most people. Because of this, you may frequently feel that you are not good enough. It can be challenging for you to appreciate just how magnificent you truly are.
How to Truly Love Yourself
Not loving yourself can make things in your life very difficult. You will find yourself filled with, and often immobilized by, indecision and doubt about the choices that you make.
In the most severe cases of not appreciating who you are, you may experience depression and self-loathing. Not loving yourself can keep you feeling so separate that it makes it hard to appreciate anything in life.
On top of all that, if you are unable to love and appreciate yourself, you will attract people that are feeling the same way. We have talked about what to do when you’ve lost your passion, and if you want to be surrounded by a loving environment you need to first love yourself.
What Can You do to Appreciate and Love Yourself?
- Become aware of your self dialogue
If you hear a recording of yourself, you may be shocked to hear how many times you say “I’m bad” or “there is something really messed up with me.” A lot of times you will notice that you treat yourself far worse than you would ever dream of treating others.
Other examples of poor self dialogue:
“I’m not (rich, smart, attractive, good, etc.) enough”
“I’ll never be able to get that job, I just don’t have what it takes”
“It’s all my fault”
“I’m bad at this”
Once you recognize that you’re beating yourself up, you can look back and identify what it was that triggered that feeling. Really focus on what happened so you can recognize the trigger. Then choose a self-loving thought, like “I AM good enough!” Maybe call a close friend or relative and let them really love you. Really listen to them and soak in all the love that they’re offering you.
- Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
One of the most common reasons why people begin to feel inadequate is because they compare themselves to others. Don’t fall into this trap! No person is better or worse than another.
We all have different gifts and talents, as well as areas of competence that we’ve achieved over the course of our lives. So while one person may be a multi-millionaire, they may not have a hold on their personal relationships yet. Everyone is different and may not always seem to be where you think they are.
- Say “YES” More Often
The word “yes” is very powerful.
Saying yes doesn’t mean that you need to agree with what someone is doing. This is an exercise to help you better appreciate yourself.
Saying yes releases any resistance that you are feeling. Resisting feeds negative energy into the situation and perpetuates the pattern, because what you resist persists. When you say “yes” you begin to break free from the habit and open to the flow of love.
What To Expect When Changes Occur
Once you begin to truly love yourself you will likely notice a few significant changes in your life.
Areas in your life where you were feeling “stuck” and going nowhere will open up for you as you remove any resistance from them. This actually happens without any force or effort. Things just start moving as you gain greater love, appreciation and acceptance of yourself.
As you are kinder to yourself, you will attract people who will be kinder to you. Life will seem gentler as well, lifting you up as opposed to beating you down.
You will gain more energy toward everything in your life.
Ready to learn how to love yourself and fully appreciate the magnificent being you really are? Join us on a journey to discover your true purpose in life.
Live on Purpose ... Change the World!
Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),
Founders, HowToLiveOnPurpose.com
Creators of the Life Purpose Quest - Seven Rites of Passage
Guides and Mentors for Self-Mastery and Personal Transformation
"Teach us love, compassion and honor ... that we may heal the Earth and heal each other." - Ojibwe
Are you telling your real story? Or, does your subconscious mind tell you the story of old thoughts, old experiences?
Our Native American Elders teach that fear is the greatest dis-ease. Fear, they say, is simply refusing your Truth. Fear is the trickster who deflects you from your Spirit’s center … from telling your real story.
Many times, your subconscious mind will direct you to follow or imitate others. It is up to you to choose whether that path is right for you.
When you become aware of your thoughts … your words … your actions …your Three Arrows of Power™, you begin to take back your power, and to build on your true purpose.
You begin to follow the Bent of your Nature.
The Elders say that when you become aware of your Self, you begin to think, to speak, to act with conscious and deliberate choice. Then, they say, you are walking the path of your Truth … and you begin to create … to manifest your highest gifts.
Consider this week’s quote:
Begin to notice, as you walk your life path, who joins you on that path. Do those fellow travelers uplift you? Do they support you as you follow the Bent of your Nature?
Seek out fellow travelers who will be strong companions for your journey, our Elders say. Seek out those whose hearts have a high vibration, who are strong … who are following their True Purpose.
They will support you on your own path, as your live your True Story.
Reach out … embrace the gifts of possibilities. Dare to ask … What If. And open your heart to a new awareness of your place in the Sacred Medicine Wheel.
Breathe deep … acknowledge your Purpose in the gifts of your life. Embrace your power in the most basic of ways … become aware again of your body as the vessel for your Spirit.
When you understand how to touch your own Spirit, by connecting again with your health as the basis for your abundance, your arms open to embrace the gifts of the world.
Now is the time for you You to tell your Real Story! How powerful you are!
Live on Purpose ... Change the World!
Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),
Founders, HowToLiveOnPurpose.com
Creators of the Life Purpose Quest - Seven Rites of Passage
Guides and Mentors for Self-Mastery and Personal Transformation
"Teach us love, compassion and honor ... that we may heal the Earth and heal each other." - Ojibwe
P.S. Wisdom Wednesday is your weekly connection with the How to Live On Purpose global community. These weekly messages are intended to help you center yourself, focus your thoughts, and be more aware of being in the present moment so you can Live On Purpose every day!
Get the “Wisdom Wednesday” message delivered directly to you — for FREE! Just fill in the form below and CLICK ‘Submit’
Native American flute music is a sound of the heart, the breath, the spirit – and it’s interpretation of the moment.
Many times while teaching or performing for great audiences, my wife Terri and I tell the story of the flute as it had been taught to us by our Native elders.
The basis of this story is that all people seek a higher understanding of themselves — an understanding of what, when, and why they are here.
That may have been a question that you posed to yourself. Are you looking for answers to:
- What is my purpose?
- When will I know how to prepare for it?
- And, why is this important to filling in missing pieces of my life?
Now, you’re probably wondering…what does this have to do with Native American flute music being effective for natural stress release? Let’s just say it was the birth of a song that started the journey of the lifetime that is mine today.
Is That All There Is?
It was over 30 years ago, and I had reached the end of rope. In my eyes, I could not see an answer. It seemed like that evening the whole world had kind of come to this point.
“Is this what my life is about?” I asked myself. I was working 12 hours a day doing repairs, then going home, eating, watching TV, and getting up the next day just to start it all over again.
The despair – compounded by stress – was painfully effecting my sleep, my working habits, and my health. And I remember in the darkness of an old room, I looked for answers.
I saw none, but in the dim light I saw a flute resting on the shelf and waiting for the call of my breath.
And so, I lifted the flute to my lips, and in that moment a song was born — a song that spoke of the deep sadness of a life that felt unfulfilled, a life that could not see or feel the possibility of living in a world that always proposed freedom but instead gave pain.
It became this song, “The Calling Song” that guided me to a greater understanding of the meaning of hope.
Native American flute music is a powerful language, one that can touch your heart and soul and provide a vehicle that transcends all others. Music is the heart of a culture and a way of forging a bond that’s understood by all beings.
To listen, to purchase or to download this recording, simply go to “Echoes of the Heart – A Sacred Journey” at: http://howtoliveonpurpose.com/echoes
So, to pose the question again, is Native American flute music effective for natural stress release? Absolutely.
Now you know what Native American flute music can be when you take the time to quiet yourself and listen to it in the way it was meant to be. Until our paths cross again…
Live on Purpose…Change the World!
Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),
Chief Robert TallTree
Ojibway Life Coach
Co-Founder of HowToLiveOnPurpose.com
Co-Creator of The 21-Day “I AM a Gift to the World!” Challenge
“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth and heal each other.”
– Ojibwe
Can You Use Complementary Alternative Medicine Techniques to Give Yourself a New Identity?
Valerie tripped and crashed to her knees on the stones. Now she was covered with blood. She hadn’t hurt herself badly this time, but now other people noticed her condition. She didn’t walk easily.
This was her long-planned trip into the wilderness to see gorillas in the wild. It was her dream trip of a lifetime!
Now she was scared – afraid people would not want to be in her group, or think she would ruin their one chance to see the gorillas.
Now she was ‘the one who limps,’ ‘the one who walks slowly’ – or ‘the one who needs help.’ A hazard! Those labels again…Ugh!!
She was on a mission! – to fulfill her lifelong dream!
They told her if she fell again, she could NOT go to see the gorillas.
She had to find a way.
She wanted other people’s support, but she was going regardless.
That was her clear intention.
So she planned to hire young Rwandan guides. She figured if she hired an extra guide and got too tired or weak, they could get her back to camp, so she would not jeopardize anyone else’s experience.
That was her commitment.
Then she turned to complementary alternative medicine techniques to see what she could do to give her strength and improve her chances of success.
1.) She used visualization, seeing and feeling herself walking strong and clear, with good energy, vitality and a sense of ease.
2.) Then she did meditation, to be centered – not reacting to other people’s fear or concern, but staying open, loving and strong.
A few ‘super-jocks’ on the trip, determined to have a great athletic mountain-climbing adventure, avoided her. But there was a more supportive group too.
The day came, and she was strong and vibrant. They headed up the mountain in early morning. It was a gorgeous day.
The Rwandan leader of her group seemed to take a liking to Val, and took her under his wing. When they came to a big stump, other people just climbed over it. The leader grabbed her with one arm, leaned her over the back of his shoulder, and swung her right over it. She landed easily on the other side. He put her down like it was nothing. This is magic, she thought. It’s easy. She was ‘in the zone.’
In less than hour, they found gorillas. The huge animals were awesome-looking. Actually, they were stunning. Just wandering along slowly, picking vegetation and munching, they were very aware of the hikers. The big one looked up. It was only ten feet away.
She had been trained to keep her head low and not make eye contact, because that can threaten a gorilla. It challenges their authority (NOT wise, as they weigh 400 to 700 pounds). So she watched and moved slowly, like the gorillas, just paying attention. A baby gorilla rolled around in the tall grass. It looked like it was smiling.
This was the experience of a lifetime! They found gorillas so fast – it usually takes two to five hours — they were allowed to stay even longer in that amazing presence. Valerie was in Heaven.
Sitting on the ground where they stopped for lunch she felt the Earth energy come up through her body and fill her. The energy of the Earth is measurably invigorating to people who put themselves in direct contact with it. She walked like a new person afterward.
She was so alive and full the return journey was easy. They were soon back at camp having tea. (It turned out the ‘super-jock’ group had climbed for 5 hours through drenching rain to find gorillas, so they got the adventure they wanted, too.) It was a great success.
ARE YOU SICK OF BEING “THE ONE WHO NEEDS HELP”?
Sick of being “the gimp,” the one with the limp, the one in the wheelchair?
Think you’ve been given the tag, or a name that describes your condition? And of course, you don’t like or want to live with that label!
If you have a tag, or a label like that, it’s very likely that – in your own mind – you have given yourself that label! Others pick it up intuitively and just treat you that way. You can change that.
GET A NEW IDENTITY! Ditch the nickname (“your condition”).
You are NOT your condition – no matter what it is!
You are a human being. You are a developing soul, a creative entity on your unique life journey. See yourself that way, with great respect and admiration for what you yourself have overcome. You have succeeded at many things.
You deserve recognition and celebration FROM YOURSELF – regardless of what anyone else thinks. All compassionate human beings want to celebrate you too. But you must go first.
PRACTICE GIVING YOURSELF APPRECIATION for at least 2 things, now. Anything counts, including getting out of bed. So there are no excuses.
CHOOSE A NEW IDENTITY for yourself now. What would you like to be known for? What would you like to become?
1 – First pick a nickname or a tag that you will give yourself.
2 – Then write a statement that starts with “I am the one who …”
3 – Then write an affirmation – a positive statement from the point of view that it is already happening successfully now. (For example: I am stronger and feeling more energetic every day! OR
I am thinking very clearly and creatively both in my work and my play.)
4 – Visualize this and say it with strong intent, clearly seeing, feeling, believing and meaning it, every morning and evening.
You will be amazed at how – if you ACT with this clear intention – it will become your reality. Carefully crafted affirmations are a powerful tool you can use to create impressive changes in your physical world – your body, mind and spirit.
Was Valerie’s success on her journey self-empowerment from her own efforts using complementary and alternative medicine methods, or was it Grace? Clearly there was Grace, and clearly she participated in that Grace, doing much to bring it to her. Our attitude, our self-concept and our participation are critical aspects of our ability to attract what we long for into our lives.
For more techniques from complementary and alternative medicine, more ideas and resources for dealing with the physical and emotional challenges that go with any serious health issues get your
Great Tips for Living with Purpose and Passion
in Spite of Disability or Chronic Illness
Anyone willing and open to new and greater awareness of themselves can do phenomenal things to affect their health and their happiness. That means you can too. Do you want to grow into your own most amazing self?
If you want to alleviate symptoms, change painful feelings of resentment or despair, and find ways to make your journey more in keeping with the life of your dreams, you can too.
To learn more, just put your email in the upper right of this page now.
Then click on: Get My Tips
You can also subscribe to the rss feed in your reader. Just click the orange chicklet on the right.
So, can you use complementary alternative medicine methods to give yourself a lift out of distressing symptoms or resentment and discouragement? Absolutely!
A disability or chronic illness can be painful and discouraging,
but it doesn’t have to limit your potential for joy and fulfillment.
No matter what your next step is, take good care of yourself and give yourself appreciation!
You absolutely deserve that!
With Deep Appreciation for You,
Julianne Blake, PhD
Dr. Wow!
Founder of BeHereWow.com
P.S. Whether or not you choose to use complementary medicine, feel free to use the techniques offered here.
To change painful feelings of fear or discouragement, feel your deeper passion and purpose, and
free yourself of labels with a new sense of identity, click Get My Tips on the top right of this page .
Please leave a comment below and share your interests and concerns. (If you’re not reading this on the BeHereWow.com blog, just click the link to leave your comment!) Your input and feedback are appreciated.
Read more:
Complementary Alternative Medicine For You?